Collie came into my room this morning crying that she was sick. She was hot, her lips were lightly blue, and she was having a hard time standing up. I asked her if she had thrown up or if she felt like she was going to, and she said no. But I heard her stomach gurgling and contracting and rushed her to the toilet. She tried to make herself throw up but could not get anything to come out, just a tiny but of spit on her lips. We went downstairs and I put her on the couch and she asked for water. She has been fine ever since, but seems to have a temperature coming and going today so far. I hope that she stays on the well side and does not get worse again, and that the rest of us don't get it.
Axl is sick as well. He woke me up twice throughout the night with an urgency to go outside. He has the runs again and is straining just like he was a few weeks ago right before we went to PA for christmas. I had taken him to the vet for a dewormer, although they did not find any evidence of worms since he could not provide a solid enough sample to test. I gave him the dewormer and he cleared right up. For this to be happening again, if worms are truly the culprit, means that they are in the yard. I don't think that there is any way to rid the yard of parasites, so I just need to start making sure that I clean up after Axl immediately after he goes out there, and start walking him more. The yard looks like hell since it is winter and Axl has torn it up a bit from running around. His urine does not help either. I need to spread out a lot of grass seeds or something to make it nice again when spring comes.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Monday, January 28, 2013
2013
Wow, six months have gone by since my last entry and so much has happened!
Back in August the kids and I moved to Lexington Kentucky, following Tim three weeks after he came here to start a new job with Lockheed Martin. I was absolutely dreading having to live in the same state as Tim's mother, but I am a hell of a lot closer to my family and friends in Ohio. Everything was going great and we even bought a new car. But I knew that buying a new car would mean that something big and bad was going to happen, and I knew exactly what that was going to be. Then it happened. Tim lost his job.
In a scramble to keep the money flowing, Tim signed up to go to Afghanistan for one year. He managed to stay long enough for Tristan's fifth birthday, and we took him to the airport the very next day.
Two days later, I got a dog! I had given up my obsessive searching for the perfect dog, saying that I am trying too hard...the dog that I am meant to have will find ME. Right away a new friend sent me a link to a dog at a rescue right here in town. I looked at him for a few days and thought about it. Tim had approved since he was gone, and I fell in love with him as soon as I met him. His trial stay at our house went perfect and he has been part of the family ever since. He is young and has a lot to learn but he is very smart and want so much to please. So now I have three kids instead of two :D
Halloween and Thanksgiving were spent with my parents in Troy. Tim's mom caused me all sorts of problems and finally I told her off. She hasn't taken to it so I still just ignore her as much as I can. For Christmas we drove to PA and it was so nice to be out there again. By this time Tim had quit his job out there and had signed up with Lockheed Martin directly, as apposed to his temporary hire before. We got to Skype with him while opening presents on xmas morning. He had tried to come home secretly to surprise me, but that didn't work out at all and only created a bigger mess. Due to a snow storm I was stuck in PA for an extra day and then spent my 11th anniversary driving home to Troy, where we stopped for a break and everyone had wedding cake. It was just as amazingly delicious as it had been a year ago! The rest of the drive down to Lexington turned into a nightmare as I ended up in a white out and had to proceed extremely slowly, tired as hell, and scared that we might night make it that night. But I just kept trying, made it home late, and picked up Axl from boarding the next day.
A week later, I was hoping that Tim was back in the states as I had not heard from him in a few days. It was getting late in the evening on the day that I should have heard something and I had given up for the day. Then Axl started growling at the door a lot, and when I turned around there was Tim sticking his face in the window! Alex and Jess had picked him up the night before in Indiana and brought him down to our house. I almost feel like he wasn't even gone for as long as he was.
In other news, as I need to wrap this up....my sister is pregnant and is having a boy!!! It is so weird. I never thought that she would ever have any children. She probably didnt either, but she had a fertility scare and decided to start trying. It took her a few months, and now she is due in May. I love buying her baby stuff :D
Well, the kids are still naked from their bath, Tim will be home soon, and I need to start preparing dinner. More later!
Back in August the kids and I moved to Lexington Kentucky, following Tim three weeks after he came here to start a new job with Lockheed Martin. I was absolutely dreading having to live in the same state as Tim's mother, but I am a hell of a lot closer to my family and friends in Ohio. Everything was going great and we even bought a new car. But I knew that buying a new car would mean that something big and bad was going to happen, and I knew exactly what that was going to be. Then it happened. Tim lost his job.
In a scramble to keep the money flowing, Tim signed up to go to Afghanistan for one year. He managed to stay long enough for Tristan's fifth birthday, and we took him to the airport the very next day.
Two days later, I got a dog! I had given up my obsessive searching for the perfect dog, saying that I am trying too hard...the dog that I am meant to have will find ME. Right away a new friend sent me a link to a dog at a rescue right here in town. I looked at him for a few days and thought about it. Tim had approved since he was gone, and I fell in love with him as soon as I met him. His trial stay at our house went perfect and he has been part of the family ever since. He is young and has a lot to learn but he is very smart and want so much to please. So now I have three kids instead of two :D
Halloween and Thanksgiving were spent with my parents in Troy. Tim's mom caused me all sorts of problems and finally I told her off. She hasn't taken to it so I still just ignore her as much as I can. For Christmas we drove to PA and it was so nice to be out there again. By this time Tim had quit his job out there and had signed up with Lockheed Martin directly, as apposed to his temporary hire before. We got to Skype with him while opening presents on xmas morning. He had tried to come home secretly to surprise me, but that didn't work out at all and only created a bigger mess. Due to a snow storm I was stuck in PA for an extra day and then spent my 11th anniversary driving home to Troy, where we stopped for a break and everyone had wedding cake. It was just as amazingly delicious as it had been a year ago! The rest of the drive down to Lexington turned into a nightmare as I ended up in a white out and had to proceed extremely slowly, tired as hell, and scared that we might night make it that night. But I just kept trying, made it home late, and picked up Axl from boarding the next day.
A week later, I was hoping that Tim was back in the states as I had not heard from him in a few days. It was getting late in the evening on the day that I should have heard something and I had given up for the day. Then Axl started growling at the door a lot, and when I turned around there was Tim sticking his face in the window! Alex and Jess had picked him up the night before in Indiana and brought him down to our house. I almost feel like he wasn't even gone for as long as he was.
In other news, as I need to wrap this up....my sister is pregnant and is having a boy!!! It is so weird. I never thought that she would ever have any children. She probably didnt either, but she had a fertility scare and decided to start trying. It took her a few months, and now she is due in May. I love buying her baby stuff :D
Well, the kids are still naked from their bath, Tim will be home soon, and I need to start preparing dinner. More later!
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
OYS
Okinawa Yard Sales. For some reason having a real yard or garage sale is not allowed for the military members that are stationed in Okinawa, Japan. Instead someone created a website for selling that stuff that people don't want anymore. While I don't understand why you can't set up a few tables in your own yard to sell your stuff, I think that sharing your items online for everyone scattered all over the island is a great idea. It even works for people like me, who want to sell things that you made yourself.
I only posted on OYS a couple of times but I received quite a few orders very quickly. My shop on Etsy hasn't been much of interest since I finally took the plunge to open it on the first day of this year. I haven't painted anything in a couple of months and I'm ready to work on something. I knew that I could still post on OYS even though I don't live there anymore. I've been thinking about it for a few weeks now but I've been afraid to for fear of any negative feedback from people who like to throw around their two cents whenever they don't like something. But why should I care?
I don't. So last night I reactivated my old account and put up a listing for my work. I woke up this morning to a reply sitting in my inbox, and another one hiding in my spam folder! I am already overwhelmed haha. I don't like having more than one order at a time because each one takes a couple of weeks to complete. I wrote back to both of them so hopefully they will follow through!
I only posted on OYS a couple of times but I received quite a few orders very quickly. My shop on Etsy hasn't been much of interest since I finally took the plunge to open it on the first day of this year. I haven't painted anything in a couple of months and I'm ready to work on something. I knew that I could still post on OYS even though I don't live there anymore. I've been thinking about it for a few weeks now but I've been afraid to for fear of any negative feedback from people who like to throw around their two cents whenever they don't like something. But why should I care?
I don't. So last night I reactivated my old account and put up a listing for my work. I woke up this morning to a reply sitting in my inbox, and another one hiding in my spam folder! I am already overwhelmed haha. I don't like having more than one order at a time because each one takes a couple of weeks to complete. I wrote back to both of them so hopefully they will follow through!
Saturday, May 12, 2012
Haunting
It takes everything I have to forget that you exist when I am awake. Yet you still find me when I am most vulnerable, raping my mind while I sleep and I am helpless to stop you. Bound and gagged. You pretend to be my friend, let me get close to you. I wake up and you are gone. I am tortured and bruised. I hate you. Please just stay out of my head.
Friday, May 11, 2012
Troy
Our hometown. All we want is to get there and start life over. We've been stumbling around in limbo for a year now and we are supposed to keep doing it for another two years. Tim is at least working towards our goal. But me...I'm just taking up space. Cleaning, cooking, constantly yelling at the kids so someone else won't. I need a paying job. I need an associate's degree. I'm wasting time and slowly throwing my dream away, sitting in the shadows and watching everyone around me being real people.
Tim finished his spring semester last week and will no longer pursue engineering. He started a welding class a few weeks ago and is excelling, naturally. Yet he is advancing at a rate that his teacher thinks is too fast and that he should slow down. I understand that his teacher is surprised and not used to it, but I see no reason to try holding him back. He will still be just as well at a slower pace so just let him go and do what he's good at.
This same teacher will be gone for two weeks to teach a class elsewhere. That elsewhere just happens to be in Troy, Ohio. Our hometown. Where we are supposed to be right now. The connection is what has me thinking about all this. All of this thinking and wanting is very heavy. And tiring. I just want to lay down and sleep until it's over and done with.
He will be teaching at Hobart, the leading company in the field that Tim is aiming for. So they have classes. Classes that Tim could start taking. If only we were ready to stand on our own feet. I just want to throw down the crutches and run. If only it were that easy. One step at a time. Every inch gets you closer. I'm staring at the path, deciding where to put my foot next.
Tim finished his spring semester last week and will no longer pursue engineering. He started a welding class a few weeks ago and is excelling, naturally. Yet he is advancing at a rate that his teacher thinks is too fast and that he should slow down. I understand that his teacher is surprised and not used to it, but I see no reason to try holding him back. He will still be just as well at a slower pace so just let him go and do what he's good at.
This same teacher will be gone for two weeks to teach a class elsewhere. That elsewhere just happens to be in Troy, Ohio. Our hometown. Where we are supposed to be right now. The connection is what has me thinking about all this. All of this thinking and wanting is very heavy. And tiring. I just want to lay down and sleep until it's over and done with.
He will be teaching at Hobart, the leading company in the field that Tim is aiming for. So they have classes. Classes that Tim could start taking. If only we were ready to stand on our own feet. I just want to throw down the crutches and run. If only it were that easy. One step at a time. Every inch gets you closer. I'm staring at the path, deciding where to put my foot next.
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Sad Bad Day
I started my day VERY depressed. Then I sprinkled a little irritability on top for some extra flavor. SIGH.
Tim and Will are gone. Wil.Liam came to visit us all this week and Tim took him back to Ohio yesterday morning. I hate it when Tim is gone and it is even worse this time because I didn't want Will to leave either. We hung out a lot and I hope that he comes back again in the summer. I wanted to eat more than I did and craft today but just couldn't get my heavy heart up off the floor. So of course that just made the kids being their usual selves even more annoying. I've just wanted to do nothing but sit alone in my room and stare at this screen all day long. Dinner time just made things worse. I'm always still hungry after dinner, but that's better than eating everything on the table.
I didn't get another vet job that I interviewed for. I really thought that I had this one for sure! They said maybe in the summer. Yeah okay. So I feel like shit for not being able to find a job. And my Etsy shop has failed so far. Someday I will be good enough, right???
Tim and Will are gone. Wil.Liam came to visit us all this week and Tim took him back to Ohio yesterday morning. I hate it when Tim is gone and it is even worse this time because I didn't want Will to leave either. We hung out a lot and I hope that he comes back again in the summer. I wanted to eat more than I did and craft today but just couldn't get my heavy heart up off the floor. So of course that just made the kids being their usual selves even more annoying. I've just wanted to do nothing but sit alone in my room and stare at this screen all day long. Dinner time just made things worse. I'm always still hungry after dinner, but that's better than eating everything on the table.
I didn't get another vet job that I interviewed for. I really thought that I had this one for sure! They said maybe in the summer. Yeah okay. So I feel like shit for not being able to find a job. And my Etsy shop has failed so far. Someday I will be good enough, right???
Sunday, April 1, 2012
March
It started with me finally taking Niko back to the vet about his nose, since he was overdue for his rabies shot anyways. The doctor thinks that Niko may have herpes in his nose and prescribed some tasty tuna flavored lysine gravy in a tube for the next few weeks to see what happens. If it helps then Niko will be taking it for the rest of his life. If it doesn't help then we can proceed with a biopsy. I'm not happy with paying $450 for such a simple surgery, but I have to remember that I don't have an employee discount like I did down in GA. The lysine definitely seems to help with all of his sneezes, snorts, and watering eyes and I think he actually likes taking it, but his breathing is still louder than a normal cat. It would be better also if I remembered to medicate him as often as directed. If we ever decide to see what a biopsy has to say, then hopefully I will be employed at a vet clinic that I have a working interview with tomorrow night!
Next came my birthday. THE birthday. The best decade of my life is now behind me. I'm thirty. I don't like it, but I sure as hell don't feel like I'm thirty. I still feel like I'm twenty, and every stranger that comments on my age says that they would've guessed me to be eighteen or twenty. So it's nice to know that I look an entire decade younger than I am and I look forward to that being the case for a very long time! We didn't do anything special. I hung out at home and cooked dinner as usual. Although I did get a handmade set of jewelry from MumMum...cute little blue stars...love it.
Then came Tim's birthday. It was a Saturday so we did go out on a date, dressed all in green for the holiday. I made an appointment to finally get my tattoo and then we went to eat sushi and watch John Carter. When we got home I made some green beer and Mum and I gave Tim a mint chocolate Klondike bar with a candle in it. Next year I plan to make green zebra brownies.
Now the appointment for my tattoo was fast approaching, and because of a conflict in schedules, I was trying to get it sooner than later. I finally got in touch with the shop right before Tim and I were about to just drive out there and walk in, hoping that evening was still available. They said they could do it so we went on as planned. Tim did NOT want to go and didn't get why I wanted him above anyone else to be there with me. This tattoo was a big deal to me, and laying on a table with my shirt pulled all the way up while a strange man stabs ink into my body for an hour wasn't something that I wanted to do all by myself. Of course it hurt a lot, but Wild Bill said that I handled it much better than a lot of dudes that get tattoos. So we had a really good experience and we both plan on going back to him for more work!
Lastly, the best part of all, I had an interview with an awesome veterinary hospital last week! I knew as soon as I talked to the manager on the phone to schedule my interview that this was going to go well. Then meeting with her was even better! She was so welcoming and friendly as soon as I walked in the door that I felt like I was already hired. We just chatted for a bit before we went back to an exam room to discuss the job. Instead of hounding me with a bunch of questions, she explained how things work there and what I would be doing. Then she gave me a tour and introduced me to the doctor, who also excitedly showed me their new digital xray machine. They talked amongst themselves in front of me about someone like I wasn't a stranger that just walked in the door. They have cats and a dog roaming the place freely, and photos of wild animals decorating the walls instead of cats and dogs like every other animal clinic...another huge plus! The hours of my shift would be perfect for Tim and I. They are a 24 hour hospital and tonight I have a working interview for four hours. I'm too excited and confident about this to be nervous! I'm already in love with this place and I hope they keep me! I could not possibly be more happy about the last vet I interviewed for not working out. That experience was the complete opposite of this one. Now, which pair of scrubs do I want to wear tonight??
Next came my birthday. THE birthday. The best decade of my life is now behind me. I'm thirty. I don't like it, but I sure as hell don't feel like I'm thirty. I still feel like I'm twenty, and every stranger that comments on my age says that they would've guessed me to be eighteen or twenty. So it's nice to know that I look an entire decade younger than I am and I look forward to that being the case for a very long time! We didn't do anything special. I hung out at home and cooked dinner as usual. Although I did get a handmade set of jewelry from MumMum...cute little blue stars...love it.
Then came Tim's birthday. It was a Saturday so we did go out on a date, dressed all in green for the holiday. I made an appointment to finally get my tattoo and then we went to eat sushi and watch John Carter. When we got home I made some green beer and Mum and I gave Tim a mint chocolate Klondike bar with a candle in it. Next year I plan to make green zebra brownies.
Now the appointment for my tattoo was fast approaching, and because of a conflict in schedules, I was trying to get it sooner than later. I finally got in touch with the shop right before Tim and I were about to just drive out there and walk in, hoping that evening was still available. They said they could do it so we went on as planned. Tim did NOT want to go and didn't get why I wanted him above anyone else to be there with me. This tattoo was a big deal to me, and laying on a table with my shirt pulled all the way up while a strange man stabs ink into my body for an hour wasn't something that I wanted to do all by myself. Of course it hurt a lot, but Wild Bill said that I handled it much better than a lot of dudes that get tattoos. So we had a really good experience and we both plan on going back to him for more work!
Lastly, the best part of all, I had an interview with an awesome veterinary hospital last week! I knew as soon as I talked to the manager on the phone to schedule my interview that this was going to go well. Then meeting with her was even better! She was so welcoming and friendly as soon as I walked in the door that I felt like I was already hired. We just chatted for a bit before we went back to an exam room to discuss the job. Instead of hounding me with a bunch of questions, she explained how things work there and what I would be doing. Then she gave me a tour and introduced me to the doctor, who also excitedly showed me their new digital xray machine. They talked amongst themselves in front of me about someone like I wasn't a stranger that just walked in the door. They have cats and a dog roaming the place freely, and photos of wild animals decorating the walls instead of cats and dogs like every other animal clinic...another huge plus! The hours of my shift would be perfect for Tim and I. They are a 24 hour hospital and tonight I have a working interview for four hours. I'm too excited and confident about this to be nervous! I'm already in love with this place and I hope they keep me! I could not possibly be more happy about the last vet I interviewed for not working out. That experience was the complete opposite of this one. Now, which pair of scrubs do I want to wear tonight??
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